Skinny Love.

I remember when I was 12. I went on camo to Wellington for school.
I had fun, it was such a cool experience, going to Wellington.
But there is a comment that will always remember.

This girl, who at the time was a very close friend told me to "watch my stomach, I was getting fat". That comment stuck with me then on. I ended up blocking it out of my mind though, because I knew I was "filling out" because of puberty and what not.
That was when I was 12.
I pretty much forgot about my weight, I didn't really care to much about how I looked, if I had fat thighs or if my stomach stuck out. Untill I was about 16.
I did dancing, jazz and tap and at the end of every year we did a recital where all the classes did a couple of dances to the public. It was always heaps of fun, I loved dressing up in the costumes doing my hair, putting on the bright red lipstick..
But when I was 16, I started feeling really self concise about how I looked, because I looked around me at the other girls and they were skinnier then me, and  prettier...I had a really tough year and I just felt so bad.
But again, I didn't care. I didn't do anything drastic. I didn't stop eating or exercise, I just forgot about it.

But now, I suddenly care about how I look, I have never felt more self concise about my body then I have this year.

I want   to be skinny.
I want a gap between my thighs.
I want a flat stomach. Not this pudgy thing I have right now.

I am currently a size 12-14.
My goal is to be back to a size 10 by the end of the year/start of next year.

I don't care how I do it right now.

My reasons for this are

• all the girls on tumblr are so pretty and skinny 
• my friends are skinny.
• My sister is skiny 
• Im scared my boyfriend will get sick of me complaining about how I look and find someone skinnier. 
• Its summer. which means shorts and singlets. 
• I just want to feel beautiful. 

That is all for know.
Maybe this is me just pmsing but Idc.